My mind it kind of goes fast

The past two weeks have been a little rough for me.

For absolutely no particular reason. I have nothing big to worry about. But it never fails, every night I have a nightmare, bad dream, or series of bad dreams. I'm grinding my teeth and whimpering like a hurt puppy.

I don't even know what triggered this.

Maybe seeing my best friend get married to the most wonderful man flipped a switch in my head. I know I'm only 22. I know I'm being ridiculous. I'm just not where I thought I would be, now.

If you asked me 2 years ago where I'd be now, I would have said that I'd be engaged to Rob, graduated, and working at some lab to make money for my future with him.

I never guessed I'd be here.
I'm not saying it's a bad thing.
It's just not where I always imagined I'd be.

I like to plan, I like to know. So this whole not-knowing business drives me absolutely crazy.

I just need to look on the bright side. Now I can travel, go on adventures, explore the world. Maybe I'll end up opening a bakery like I've dreamed. Maybe I'll move to NYC.
Maybe.

We'll see where this year takes me.